What can I say about being a Dominant?
Remember this is my opinion and all Doms will see things their own way. First and foremost a Dom is always a gentleman (or gentlewoman) in all aspects of life. I truly believe in chivalry, a man should always hold a door for a woman. Every woman. You should always follow a woman up the stairs and lead her down. This is so if she should fall, you are there to catch her. A Dom should also always be in control. You shouldn’t loose your temper or punish when you’re angry because that is definitely not being in control. You should earn the respect of your submissive. I don’t understand how some Dom’s expect a person they just met to call them “Master”. To believe you should be treated as a Dom before you even prove you have what it takes to be dominant. A Dom must be willing to prove themselves worthy of someones submission.
Dom and Sub
As in a position of power you should have the up most respect for your sub and always have their safety in mind. Remember you are responsible for someones life. Regardless of how much of your subs life you manage you should keep in mind that persons emotional, mental, and physical well being is in your hands. Your sub gives themselves to you willingly. It is not something you can take, it is earned through respect and trust. If you are taking their submission you are an abusive piece of shit and have no right calling yourself a Dom. The intense relationship and feelings that is the BDSM lifestyle is a beautiful thing. People in vanilla relationships will never know that deep of a connection with someone. It can only be experienced through the total trust shared between the people in the relationship.
A Contract or Agreement
Before taking on a sub be sure to have a written contract of limits, hard and soft, and what they are willing to try. Well define your expectations and make clear of what the consequences are for noncompliance. Whether written or verbal limits must be communicated. Everyone is different and it takes time for some people to catch on to certain things. Know when to be patient and when to be stern. During initial training you are always harder than you would be normally to ensure your new sub understands the seriousness of your needs. Consistency is key. You can’t expect your sub to learn to take care of you and understand your needs and consequences if they are always changing.